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How to Explain "What You Do" When Asked by Strangers

Ashly Lorenzana’s Avatar Article by Blog Slixa Under Cover

The thoughtful advice and opinions of the author of this article are meant to be informative and entertaining and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of Slixa.

Escorts face a unique challenge when confronted with one of the most common small talk starters that is thrown around in our society. That question, of course, is "So, what do you do?"

Usually this question is asked in a professional context, hinting at a curiosity regarding how you make a living. The problem is obvious when you're chatting with someone you have probably just met. What in the world do you say?

The worst thing is being asked this when you're least expecting it and it catches you totally off guard. Trust me, I've been there. Ladies who have another job in addition to their escort work are lucky, because they already have a cover story and it's already conveniently true as well!

That's ideal. Something true, that you don't have to lie about or make up on the spot and that you can back up with real experience and credibility. However, for women who work exclusively as escorts, this tends to be a dreaded question and I know that on more than one occasion I wished strangers would simply mind their own business altogether.

For the sake of not being rude, I've tried several different approaches when asked this question over the years. Here are my most likely answers:

  1. "I am in between jobs at the moment." This one is easy because it doesn't require much follow up discussion. Claiming to be out of work usually either halts the conversation or at least helps it move on to a different topic.
  2. "I'm a dancer." Sometimes sticking as close to the truth as possible is your best bet. Since strippers aren't too far off, I've used this one a couple of times when asked. It's clearly more socially acceptable and many people will not inqiure further when you give them this answer.
  3. "I'm an escort." Depending on the person and the situation, I typically prefer to just come out with the truth and then it becomes the other person's decision whether they want to continue talking or drop the subject right then and there. While I don't recommend being this forward in all situations, I have sort of developed a sixth sense when it comes to feeling people out and getting some idea of how they will react to an answer as blunt as the truth. Usually this is either well received with an open mind, or it stops unwanted conversations dead in their tracks.

Of course, there are several other answers you could try out too. You can claim to be a student, which should work pretty well. Just be sure to add something about how you are attending a community college or trying to get into a specific program, so the next question doesn't become, "really, what's your major?"

Ultimately, different answers for different people will be the best policy. Only you can decide who should know the truth and who needs a slightly different story.


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