You’ve decided to see an escort. Now what?            

This guide will help you plan, prepare for, and enjoy your first visit with an escort. Learn how to avoid beginner pitfalls and have great dates every time.

Terms you need to know:

GFE: GFE stands for the girlfriend experience. The girlfriend experience does not apply to a set of unsafe practices, but rather to a style of date.            

If you hire a GFE escort, you can expect the time spent together to feel warm and flow naturally. She’ll likely chat with you, cuddle, and generally focus on putting you at ease, rather than a porn-star or action-centered experience.            

Due to its general enjoyability, the girlfriend experience has risen in popularity over time and is now the most common experience offered by high end escorts. It’s a great option for nervous newbies, who want a honeymoon-phase college girlfriend experience rather than a wham-bam checklist.            

PSE - PSE stands for ‘pornstar experience.’ If you’re interested in trying something with a hot chili pepper heat level, but not necessarily as much cuddling and connection, this is for you!            

Investment / Donation / Tribute / Gift: Some companions choose to give their rates a cute name, but these terms all mean one thing. They’re her rates. Rates are non-negotiable and should be discreetly paid at the beginning of the date.            

Some escorts will share how they’d like to receive rates on their websites. In the absence of direct instruction from her, the proper etiquette is to present rates in an unlabeled, unsealed envelope that you’ve left in plain sight near the entrance of your hotel room. If you’re visiting her hotel room, place the envelope in her view immediately upon arrival. Do not say anything about the rates, she knows what they are.            

Once the envelope has been presented she will likely collect it and withdraw to the bathroom for a few minutes to verify full payment.            

If you meet in public, hand her the envelope upon her/your arrival at the date venue. Again, don’t mention the money. If you’d like an additional level of discretion, for everyone’s comfort, place the envelope inside a book or a gift bag.            

Screening - Many escorts, especially those on the higher end who are selective with the clients they accept, will require screening before you can book a date. During this process, she’ll collect some information from you (commonly a selfie with ID, your phone number, a LinkedIn or company page, references, or any combination of the aforementioned).            

You may be nervous about sending your personal data to an escort, but remember that if you are a man and she is a woman she is often in a physically vulnerable position relative to you. By letting her know that you’re a safe, reasonable human during booking she’ll be more comfortable during your date and better able to show you a great time.

Still nervous? Choose a provider who is established - you can check that she has a website, ads, and a Twitter account with some history to make sure that she’s been around long enough for any shady business practices to catch up to her. A professional escort will take measures to protect client data in order to build a sustainable brand.            

Deposit - Many escorts, especially the more selective escorts on the higher end, will require deposits of anywhere from 10-25% of the booking fee in order to protect against no-shows. Her website should list her deposit policy, as well as her cancellation policy.            

For extended dates, including fly-me-to-you dates, some escorts will require up to a 50% deposit.            

Again, make sure the escort you have chosen is reputable and established by checking out her website, ads, and twitter account before sending a deposit. This will protect you against scams.

How to plan a date with an escort

You know you want to see an escort, but you’re not sure how to make it happen. Here’s how to plan for your date.

Decide what you’re looking for.

Do you want a GFE or a PSE provider? To decide, think about whether connection or acrobatics is more important to you for this visit. You can always make a different decision on a future escort date.            

Do you want to spend an hour together, or a meal and some private exploration, or have the best sleepover of your life? If you’re completely new to seeing escorts, I always recommend sharing a meal and some private time, at the minimum. That’ll allow you enough time to relax into things. It also follows the same structure of the traditional dates you’re used to, just with a guaranteed great outcome.            

Do you have a preferred personality type? Think about what sort of women you like. Bubbly, bookish, girl next door, into sports, etc. The great thing about escorts is that there’s so much diversity out there, so you can find what really does it for you!            

Do you have a preferred physical type? From hair color, to body type, to ethnicity, to dress sense, think about what works for you and what doesn’t.

Choose an escort.

Visit a reputable ad site, like Slixa, and choose a shortlist of escorts that catch your eye. You can sort by location, or opt to fly someone to you if you want the ability to choose from the full catalog.            

Once you have your shortlist, visit their websites to narrow down by budget, personality, etc.

Check that your escort is reputable and established.

Once you’ve chosen your ideal companion, make sure that she’s real and professional. Some things to look for include an established twitter account, possibly a blog, possibly ads on multiple sites, and possibly the age of her website.

Especially as a newbie you might not want to take a chance on someone who just started escorting yesterday. If she’s been around and active for at least several months, especially on social media where she’s engaging with the sex work community, she’s likely legitimate.

Send a complete booking inquiry.

Her website should outline what she considers a complete booking request and how she’d like to receive it, whether that’s via email, text, or voice call.            

Expect to need to include her requested screening information, your desired date and time of booking, how much time you’d like to spend together, where you’d like to meet, and what you’d like to do IF you want to spend some time together outside of the room.            

While it’s good to discuss restaurant, show, etc. options, do not discuss anything explicit about your private time. This is for your protection as well as hers.            

If she accepts your date request, she may ask for a deposit. It is good etiquette to send that within about 24 hours. Understand that the time you’ve requested is likely not being held for you until she receives the deposit.

Follow up the day before.

Especially if you’re booking several days, weeks, or months in advance, send her a follow-up email a day or two before your date to confirm meeting time and location.            

Booking early is great, and ensures she has plenty of time to prepare to give you an exceptional experience, and the day-before follow-up makes sure there’s no miscommunication or uncertainty about anything.

How to prepare for a date with an escort

The big day is here: you’re finally going to meet your first escort. Here’s how to prepare day-of to ensure an excellent experience.

Groom yourself.

The cleaner you are and the better you smell, the more she’ll enjoy spending time close to you. Shower thoroughly before the date and be prepared to take another quick shower upon her arrival, if she requests it.            

When you shower, pay extra attention to any bits of your body that you hope she’ll be spending time with. Lift, scrub, and clean in all the little folds.            

Brush your teeth thoroughly, including your tongue, and swish with mouthwash shortly before her arrival. You want to be fresh when she arrives, so don’t let too much time pass between this step and her arrival. If you drink a coffee or an hour has passed, freshen up your oral hygiene.

Dress comfortably.

Do you have a favorite outfit, something that makes you feel like a stud? It doesn’t need to be fancy, it just needs to be clean and comfortable. If you’re going on a lunch, dinner, theater, etc. date with time outside of the room, be sure that your choice of attire is appropriate for the venue.

Don’t overindulge.

You don’t need to imbibe alcohol, or anything harder, to have a good time with an escort. If you’ve chosen an established, reputable provider with an eye toward personality compatibility, she’ll put you at ease better than any substance ever could.

An escort experience is often a significant investment, so you’ll want to be sharp enough to remember it! Those hot memories will keep you warm on many a cold winter night…

How to enjoy a date with an escort

The moment has come. Your escort is here! These simple steps will help you enjoy every moment of your time together.

Forget about checklists.

You’ve hired a professional and you’ve prepared yourself as a good client does. She knows how to help you have a good time, so don’t worry about ticking items off of a list.            

When all is said and done you’re going to enjoy the way she can make you feel through an amazing, comprehensive experience of love and intimacy - not a checklist of to-do’s that jar you both out of the moment unnecessarily.

Treat her like a beloved girlfriend.

You want to be treated like an adored, treasured boyfriend whom she’s head over heels for. Treat her as a beloved girlfriend and it’ll be all the easier for her to deliver that experience!            

Don’t break the fourth wall unnecessarily during your experience. You both know this probably isn’t going to be a forever thing, but that doesn’t mean that your shared time can’t be real and wonderful. Treasure the moments you have together, and she’ll have you walking on clouds by the time your date concludes.            

There aren’t more line items, because it’s really that simple. You’re ready to go forth and have the time of your life! And while escorts love gifts and tips as much as anyone else, the best compliment for a date with exceptional chemistry is to book her again soon. Don’t worry - you won’t annoy her, we adore our regulars.            

Have fun!

This article was made possible by Lulu Black