Professional submissive (or professional switch) is arguably the riskiest job in this industry. While escorts, masseuses, and pro Dommes worry about the bad luck of winding up with a client who hurts them, we seek out clients who want to do just that. The key for us is that these clients only hurt us how we want to be hurt and that they know how to do so safely. There are plenty of precautions we can take, but women who are new to the industry are likely to learn them the hard way, self included. I hope to help other pro subs and pro switches avoid that difficult path by sharing which safety protocols have worked for me.
When I say they’ve worked, I mean that I haven’t been harmed in any way in my submissive sessions since implementing these protocols. However, my increased selectivity has decreased the number of submissive sessions I do, and I’ve had to supplement that income through other means. These suggestions may not work for you financially then, but I trust that you will be able to weigh your financial security against your physical security and your other options, and will figure out the wisest choice for yourself.
Perhaps the most important precaution pro subs and switches can take for our safety is adequate screening. I’m not alone in believing that a reference from another provider is the best kind of screening there is. This lets you know that a client is safe and respectful within the context of a session, which is more than a criminal background check might reveal since providers are often reluctant to go to police. I prefer getting at least one reference from all clients, but for potential Dom clients I request two. This may seem strict, but it’s not uncommon for predators to behave respectfully around one or more people in their target victim demographic (whether that be children, intimate partners, or service providers) in order to bolster their credibility. Asking for two references makes it harder for them to do this.
Of course, not all clients have references. There are a lot of men who are new to paying for BDSM services, or to BDSM in general, and I like to give them another option for screening. I ask these men for employment verification information, so that I know they are who they say they are, and then I meet up with them for a sexy lesson in a busy commercial dungeon. This allows us to get to know each other outside of the session dynamics and outside of a potentially dangerous outcall location. It also allows me the opportunity to teach these men to spank me exactly how I like to be spanked, and I find that plenty of them—especially the newbies—are eager to learn.
I also employ one final screening precaution. Before I session with any client, I ask him to fill out a brief questionnaire of his likes, dislikes, and limits, so that I can better plan our session. I can also look back on his responses if, like many clients, he disappears for a few months before returning for another appointment. For Dom clients, I add an additional question or two to test his knowledge of BDSM safety and make sure he knows what he's doing! Having this in writing lends both of us some liability protection should either of us get injured.
These somewhat rigorous screening protocols might put off some clients, but I’ve found that there are a good number who appreciate just this sort of professionalism, and these are the clients I try to cultivate. Regardless of whether these pre-session precautions work for you, stay tuned for the second part of this piece, in which I'll discuss in-session safety tips all pro subs and switches can utilize.