Abigail Glass’s Cover Photo

Abigail Glass

+can help change your tire

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Well-meaning teachers always told me to do what I loved.

I’m weird. You’re weird. This is weird.

The only thing to do is meet and look at each other and try really hard to pretend everything isn’t surreal as we pour a glass of wine and emit well-rehearsed, attractive laughter.

My enjoyment gland is throbbingly huge. If I can enjoy modern art museums, you’ll be a breeze.

I’m into finding delight in everything - weirdness, intimacy, and pain. I am full of curiosity and love, all my hatreds are pretend, and the only thing I truly judge is astrology.

I’m a dropout autodidact with smooth thighs, a terrible writer of poetry, and a fantastic dancer in high heels.

I’m based in SF and visit NYC, but even if you’re not in one of those, shoot me an email! I have a wonderful assistant who will ping you if I visit your city.

My website is the pinnacle of God’s creation and will spawn a delicious homebaked cinnamon muffin somewhere* on your property every time you refresh the page, so you should immediately click my website link before the muffins run out.

The Look

Abigail Glass is a 5'8", slender, 28 year old caucasian woman with long brunette hair and hazel eyes.

She is available for Male, Female, and Couples.




I’m an entrepreneur who somehow avoided tech, which is a real narrow miss in San Francisco. I’m also a writer focusing on light, fun topics like “dissecting our motivations” and “the nature of insanity” and “how to be sad really efficiently.”

I enjoy aggressively not judging people, sparkling water and long skirts, combating/giving into materialism, sitting at the front of airplanes, and asceticism.


You got yourself a bit of deposits here, a gift card there, yadda yadda ‘discreet’ all over the place. For the full deets, check out my website.

Contact Info
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