Male Chastity and Orgasm Control: The Eroticism in Sexual Denial

The eroticism of sexual denial and orgasm control has been something of a public secret in GLBT and BDSM communities where adult toys and devices have been aggressively marketed and readily available for decades. As ways to achieve longevity in sexual relations becomes more of an acceptable mainstream conversation, chastity is coming out of the Dark Ages and into the light of American bedrooms. You may be thinking of female chastity, with fantasy images of Roman slaves with their vulvas exposed on the auction block, or of Medieval women in metal lock and key devices warding of rape during battle. Ah, the ever-controversial chastity.

According to Chastity UK, the first female device proven authentic is housed at the Cluny Museum of Paris. Made of metal, velvet and ivory it offers adornment, though certainly for perverse intentions. The history of female chastity is muddled with much fantasy, and of course, religious dogma.

“Love clamors far more incessantly and passionately at a closed gate than an open one!”

Marie Corelli, The Master Christian

The history of male chastity is modern, and clear in the intention: to minimize masturbation and prevent erection from getting in the way of day to day life or while in war. Patented in the US in 1911 as a “surgical device,” it was a most effective and unique method strapping around the waist and through the legs, with an encasement over the penis and around the scrotum, or for those whose balls may not fit, without the scrotum sack, with a lock that sat lightly on the side to prevent slippage. Looking at diagrams of the Heyser cock cage, it is no surprise that most men would laugh off any suggestion to experiment with this concept.

Except that cock cages have evolved into a multi-million dollar global industry with devices being made from premium medical grade soft silicone, carved wood, high tech plastiks, and even stainless steel made to size. Looking on the internet we can see the selection: AL Enterprise CB Series through 6000, DickCage, BirdLocked, and more — holy moly! These devices can’t all be about torture, can they?

Many couples are realizing that incorporating sexual denial into female led relationships can be an amazing way of making sure that the sex is always potent. Instead of viewing it as a form of humiliation, the element of control allows concentrated focus on the intensity of the desires a man feels through the head of his dick, deep down into his balls (this is also briefly touched on in the currently popular “No Fap” movement). Only…he can’t act on that. With a chastity device securely in place, every partial hard-on becomes a reminder of what is waiting on the other side of the device. Her. Her interest. Her focus. Her pleasure. Her pussy. If she is satisfied enough, perhaps the lock will come off, and that pounding, raging hard on can be put where it wants to be: right in the palm of her hand or deep in the secret garden of your fantasies!

“I like being hot and bothered and at the ready for her 24/7. Chastity assures that I’m always more than eager to please her.”

-Locked Husband

Wikipedia describes multiple genres of erotic sexual denial as easily as we discuss multiple orgasms: tease and denial, tie and tease, total denial, deconstructed orgasm — basically all of this leading to what could be described as a slow masturbation or a “milking” of the cock through control.

This sounds like a lot of fun to experiment with, especially now that soft silicone and plastic devices can fit inside a pair of boxer shorts and khaki pants or business slacks easily enough to allow passage through the TSA scan. Going on a business trip for a few days? “Here dear, let’s package you up so that I know not only are you not masturbating without me, no one else is getting near my gift basket!”

Modern American men have a hard time wrapping around this idea — as hard as wrapping that first silicone ring around the sack — however it is obviously a trend increasing in global popularity, with devices available in a range of options. The intention behind the use is entirelty up to you and your partner in play. Just be sure you have an extra copy of the key or a clear cut way out in case it doesn’t quite suit you!


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